::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

[pakarang]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

A friend (from the US) sent me this one:

[Guest]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

A friend (from the US) sent me this one:

HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!

I've got TEARS running down my face!!!!

[pakarang]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!

I've got TEARS running down my face!!!!

I've never been categorized in the group "pussies" and let them get away with it..... but look, India and the Middle East, "call centers".

[Sterkoder]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

I've got TEARS running down my face!!!!

That's called 'recognition'....

[pakarang]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

That's called 'recognition'....

Now, that's even more hilarious than the map itself....

[pakarang]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

Letter to husband - you'll love the p.s.

My darling husband, Before you return from your business trip, I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pick up truck when I turned into the driveway.

Fortunately it's not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don't worry too much about me.

I was coming home from Wal-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on the accelerator instead of the brake.

The garage door is slightly bent but fortunately the pick up came to a halt when it bumped into your car.

I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality you will
forgive me. You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart.

I am enclosing a picture of the damage for you.

I cannot wait to hold you in my arms again.

Your loving wife.
XXX

P.S. Your girlfriend called.

[Remarc]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

A tough old cowboy counseled his grandson that if he wanted to live a long life, the secret was to sprinkle a pinch of gun powder on his oatmeal every morning.

The grandson did this religiously to the age of 103 when he died. He left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 45 great-grandchildren, 25 great-great-grandchildren, and a 15-foot hole where the crematorium used to be.

[Guest]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

Ok, that has me Laughing my "born-really-close-to-Texas-and-so-I-know-lots-of-cowboys" a$$ off........

[Remarc]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

A PRESCRIPTION FOR STRESSFUL TIMES
I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me
today, and we all could probably use more calm in our lives. Some
doctor on TV this morning said the way to achieve inner peace is to
finish all the things you have started.

So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't
finished so I have managed to finish off a bottle of Merlot, a
bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, a pockage
of Prungles, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valiuminun scriptins, the
res of the chesescke an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how bludy
fablus I feel rite now. Plaese sned dhis orn to dem yu fee ar in ned
ov iennr pisss. An telum, u blody luvum.!! Xx

[Remarc]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

In Cahoots.....

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots.
Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane.
They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there.
I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too
much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt.
That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense!
It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart!
At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

Author Unknown

[pakarang]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

In Cahoots.....

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots.
Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane.
They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there.
I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.

I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too
much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt.
That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense!
It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart!
At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

Author Unknown

Funny.! Loved it... thanks for the laugh!

[Remarc]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

This would be an acceptable reason to laugh at a funeral...

A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life.

A huge heart.... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners just burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, 'I'm so sorry... I was just thinking of my own funeral...I'm a gynaecologist!'

The priest fainted!

[The Sea-Otter]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

hahaha ^^ Thank you for sharing that one, Remarc!

[Remarc]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

Fantasy Island

A man was stranded on a desert island for 10 years.

One day a beautiful girl swims to shore in a wetsuit....

Man: "Hi! Am I ever happy to see you."

Girl: "Hi! It seems like you've been here a long time. How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"

Man: "It's been ten years!"

With this information the girl unzips a slot on the arm of her wet suit and gives the man cigarette.

Man: "Oh thank you so much!"

Girl: "So tell me how long its been since you had a drink?"

Man: "It's been ten years"

The girl unzips a little longer zipper on her wet suit and comes out with a flask of whiskey and gives the man a drink.

Man: "Oh... thank you so much. You are like a miracle!"

Girl: [Starting to unzip the front of her wet suit.] "So tell me then, how long has it been since you played around?"

Man: "Oh, my God, don't tell me you've got a set of golf clubs in there too?!"

[janihudi]

Re: ::: Creating that gorgeous smile of the day :::

i want a controler like that